On the desk...

Dreaming 2021 (12/20/20)

During the last days of 2020, I created pages in my bullet journal devoted to assessing the year that just passed, and planning for 2021. I believe in a considered life; I want to be a good steward of my precious time on earth. I have not always been so. I’ve been overly accommodating, not always pushing myself to go after what I really wanted in my heart. Because I’ve felt so much regret about “wasted years,” I made a sacred vow to show more agency, to be intentional, to strive for what is meaningful and gives me joy. By reflecting on past actions, then writing down goals for the year ahead, I can make more dreams happen. I’ve been doing this for several years and the results have been life-altering.

My brain responds so well to the physical act of writing with pen and pencil. This form of writing, shaping words on the page with my fingers clutched around the writing instrument, clarifies my thoughts. Putting down words on the page also creates accountability. Goals stay a priority when I can turn to them daily and consider, how am I doing with this one? Am I making progress? What’s holding me back? Or, as sometimes happens, is this goal still important to me?

2020 was a crazy year. Covid turned everything upside down, including many of my plans. I created a Future Log for 2020 and never filled in anything beyond March, the month my mother died. This year, I’ll go ahead and make six months of plans and see what happens. We’re still in a pandemic and the forecast for vaccinations changes daily, but I’ll make plans with the current state of the world in mind, changing the things I can, and accepting those things I cannot. And move forward, always forward.

Dreamcheck (7/24/19) Linda-Marie

Every so often I check in with my dreams. Have they changed? Has a new one emerged and another drifted away? Do I need to work harder to achieve them? Or work softer, with an open heart and trust?

By making a list, I bring my focus inward, and commit once more to my dreams, some as old and delicate and precious to me as Faberge eggs, others as new as the one sparked on a recent day, when my sister smiled at me, said just the right thing, and I took out my pen and paper, and began.

I do my dreamcheck in my bullet journal, in between the planner and journal pages. As I’ve said before, my bullet journal is my brain, and my brain is always moving down multiple tracks, sometimes at the same time (in which case I’m only devoting a half or third brain to something, which is probably not good!). I set the stage for such powerful thinking by adorning the page. Being creative opens me up to the goal of catching those dream clouds as they pass across my mind’s horizon. 

Out come the pencil, the pens and colored pencils, the stamps, the handy eraser. I never know, beyond drawing a celebratory banner of some kind, what my illustrated pages will look like until I start in. They take shape organically, and any mistakes-blobs of ink, misquotes (as on this page), regretful color choice-stay as part of the design. My bullet journal is not a place where I strive to be “perfect.”

Then I set down my dreams. Which might take a few days. I’m still working on this list days later.

What’s interesting is that many months, even years later, I will look at this list like a snapshot in time. Did I achieve any of these dreams? Were they worth the effort? Did I decide some were not worth pursuing? And I will make a new list, with new dreams, or a renewed commitment to make some happen, especially the ones that keep appearing on my lists.

What are your dreams? Write them down, and see what happens…

Where I take my journal or is it where my journal takes me?  - (8.4.18) Diane

I have a conflict in my brain about journals:  I am a results-driven person and writing my thoughts in a journal is a challenge as I usually feel a desire to write as a release with no game plan.  Often, I end up dissatisfied with 3-8 pages of babble about minutiae and worry.  I rarely feel better...“Why am I doing this?”

Yet, I have journal envy... samples. 

A journal is a grown-up version of a diary.   You remember a diary, right?  That private book of important thoughts written down by a girl likely in purple pen with many exclamation points about this cute and amazing boy who doesn’t even notice her.  She ponders if purple mascara might help. 

As a teen, I remember friends, maybe even Linda-Marie or Kathy owning journals with a locked binder and a tiny key.   What did they write about?

I carry the idea of a diary as I write in my journal.  I often have 2 issues.  One, I judge what I write harshly -- usually pointless self-indulgent babble and two, I likely have inked words that may crush the spirit of the reader or worse, poke the hornets nest just as the stingers are waking from their nap.    

But, I am a curious girl and this dot idea peaked my interest.  Fewer words, more structure, check boxes...hmmm...Linda-Marie showed me – pages with a grid of almost invisible dots vs. lines or blank.  I like the idea of illustrations, doodles, ways to letting my mind have it’s way as I stare at the page in search of a thought, a word. 

So, the dots got me to open the book pen in hand but I couldn't get past the problem of exposure...I shared this with a trusted friend.  

“Screw that” she replied and shared her technique.  She told me to let go of writing in a book and instead, write and burn.  Any paper will do.  Yellow legal pads work well she suggested.  She explained.  “Write out your thoughts without hesitation and remove any encumbrance about the afterlife by burning the pages once written.  If you aren't able to burn, then shred, tear up the pages – but do not hold onto them.  Honor and value the process."  I am blessed to have friends like her.  This is my way for most of my writing.  

But, I still like the idea of forecasting, planning, tackling goals for myself with joy and commitment.   I would use this dotted grid to dig in, plow forward one hand drawn box at a time.  Like many good ideas, I am slow to adopt and build into a habit -- especially if I have some ambivalence.  So, I am here to share my truth.  As encouraging as they can be, if I am not ready to change, putting these little tracker boxes down may only serve to hammer down my struggling ego.  I am not giving up, just pausing, shifting...

Currently, I use my dotted journal as a place to play with an idea and not a place to go to daily, weekly, even monthly.  I go when I want.  I may add the boxes back at some point, but not now.

This month,  I decided to think about my Spark of Joy, Marie Kondo effort in my home.  I want to simplify my life and remove extra stuff that is more of a burden than joy. 

I began to consider the rooms in my house and what the key ingredients in each are.  Anything not on the list gets moved out.  Writing was joyful, holding to the idea of what I write is joyful.  Cleaning out, looking at expensive or useful items that didn’t make the list is hard.  When I feel low energy, I look at my pages, take a big visual whif and go back to my kitchen and find a new home for the dozens of items that need a new home.

Linda-Marie recently sent along a good Ted-Talk about decluttering and finding joy.  It is a great talk. 

Beginning the Next Bullet Journal. . . (8/1/18) Linda-Marie

I began my first bullet journal on February 6, 2017. The next starts on October 1. For a couple of months, I’ll be closing out one journal, and scheduling appointments and drawing in the other. Switching back and forth is sometimes cumbersome, but I’m finding the page-marking ribbons quite handy.

I fell in love with my original journal. It chronicles a life in transition, my thoughts as I started a new job, began this blog with Diane, birthed a women’s salon, and pursued other dreams that had been too long on hold. Bullet journaling was one of the most important tools for making these changes realities. I wrote down goals, created strategies and a timeline, and held myself accountable. I journaled and illustrated along the way, blowing off steam, congratulating myself when things went well, and adjusting deadlines. Sometimes I even let dreams go, only to replace them with others.

As I start my new bullet journal, I consider what I liked in the original, and what could be better. Did I use the index? No, not really. The monthly tasklist? Only at first, then abandoned. The future log? Yes, and I will make that a stronger feature in the new journal. I use my journal as a planner, setting out a week at a glance, with space for work and personal tasks, and room for journaling. I leave empty pages throughout for the future logs, doodling, dreaming, longer journal entries, and random features I may decide to add in. If there’s one thing you learn by bullet journaling, it’s an appreciation for evolution. (And making art out of mistakes).

Exciting new feature: stamps! My husband, Jon, pulled out a box of stamps from storage that I’ll use to enhance my drawings and mark special days. I’m also keen on bringing more color to the journal, working ahead to pen in banners and borders that I’ll fill with color on evenings when a glass of wine and a bunch of sparkling pens is the perfect end to a day. The best thing about my bullet journal? It can be whatever I want it to be, and it can always change, as my life changes.

Year One: Bullet Journal Update (4/4/18) Linda-Marie

A year in, my bullet journal remains my faithful companion. Its core features are the same: weekly logs, weekly journaling, future logs for plans six months out, and doodling. It travels with me on road trips, and moves around the house. Mostly it lives on my desk, except on Sundays, when I take it to the living room couch or to bed to reflect on the past week.

Some people keep separate work and personal bullet journals, to support a healthy work-life balance. I  prefer using the same journal for everything. I need to see the big picture in one place, to view the entire list of tasks in a day, week, or month. By going global with one journal, I can more easily see when my work-life balance is off. If I’m checking off lots of work tasks while my personal tasks continue unaddressed (or the opposite), I have a visual that things are out of whack. You can only migrate tasks from week to week for so long before you realize you need to address something or let it go.

What’s changed in the last year? I journal more. I love creating colorful art on random pages. I’m taking up more space with work notes (trying very hard to resist stickies and pieces of paper). I’ve grown less vigilant of the future log, which is not a good thing, but I’m on it! The beauty of a bullet journal is that I can adapt it to deal with these changes, reserving more pages between weekly logs for journaling, art, and work notes. I can make the future log more colorful, so it doesn’t escape my eye.

Bullet journals are a wonderful way to engage with life. Not only is the bullet journal my brain, it’s become my heart. More than a planner and organizer, it’s an important space for imagining and creating beauty, both on the page and in daily life. I sometimes think, “How did I live without a bullet journal?” I somehow managed, but life is so much sweeter and less stressful when I work with this simple, so deeply useful, tool.

Linda-Marie                                                                                                           Bullet Journal Bliss

One of the best things I did in 2017 was begin a bullet journal. This is my planner, journal, and doodling book, my organizing hub, and destressor. I remember sitting in a presentation about time management and discovering that our brains are not meant to store lists of information and future tasks. It’s much more efficient to get those rambling thoughts down on paper. I go a step further: instead of scribbling to-do lists and big ideas on sticky notes or random slips of paper, I write them in my bullet journal. This effectively declutters my brain and records worries and inspirations where I will later address them. As I tell my husband, if I write it in my bullet journal, I’ll take care of it one way or another. Once I’ve completed tasks, I check them off, still keeping a record of all I’ve accomplished, which is doubly gratifying.

I learned about bullet-journaling from my friend Clara. I researched online to decide on format and soon came up with an initial approach. My journal has evolved over the year as I realized what works for organization, planning, and tracking. Initially, I created monthly trackers to keep an eye on good habits. These very linear pages transformed over time into illustrated pages with spontaneous written impressions. My monthly task lists are now part of my “future log,” where I schedule items months in advance. I never use the index but I keep up with it. My constants are weekly logs, weekly journaling, future logs for monthly tasks and long-range plans, and doodling. I record all appointments in my google calendar, too, in case I should ever lose my bullet journal, but otherwise, I depend on my bullet journal, look at it every day, and keep it with me from desk to far-flung destination. Want some inspiration? Check this bullet journal by Liz!

Linda-Marie
A Desk of One's Own

I love my desk. It's an old-fashioned wooden desk, painted a dark greenish blue, with a glass top and seven drawers. I bought it last year at a consignment furniture store when I knew I was heading in the "work-from-home" direction. It sits next to my husband's, before windows that face our front yard gardens and the street. For much of the year, a hanging basket with flowers is in the window attracting hummingbirds, bees, and butterflies. I'm mulling a bird feeder for the winter months, but wonder if a non-hibernating bear will yank it down before our eyes. This happens in our neighborhood.

A stack of unread books rises up on one corner of the desk next to a "True Rulers are not Born; We are Made" mug filled with pencils and pens. On my left lies my bullet journal and an inbox of bills, project folders, and other urgent items I don't want to forget about. On my right sits a statuette of a woman reading, a small print urging "Hold on to your dream," and a pretty stone from Ireland. In the middle rests my new iMac, which has saved my eyes.

My father, who was in Human Resources, didn't work from a desk. I emulated that when I was General Manager at Malaprop's Bookstore/Cafe. Desks can project a fiefdom and hierarchy, and I preferred team-style leadership. But now, as a remote worker, my desk is my organizing hub, the center of which is my bullet journal. Therein lies my agenda, my goals, my calendar, my journal, and a place to be creative with art and quotes. I check it every day, and copy all appointments into my calendar in the cloud. 

I have two pieces of wall art above my desk, for inspiration. One is "Grandmother Tree" by John MacKah, and the other is a signed broadside by Billy Collins of his poem, "My Hero." Though I prefer minimalism, my desk gets crowded. At the end of each day, I clean and organize the surface, so that every morning I start anew.

Diane
My Starship Enterprise

My mahogany desk was waiting for me in the back corner of my favorite consignment store, Foryu furnishings. I rubbed my hand across the smooth top and noted there were no nicks, no water marks and was drawn to the deep tone and fine grain.  How could I be so lucky?  The sales person told me the piece was a hard sell it because it was a narrow dining table without any chairs.  He showed me the two leaves to double the length to 8 feet.  

As if the wood builder knew me, the carved cross beam that connect the pedestals at the base is the perfect perch for my feet.  I often tap out my anxiety or press my toes downward and stretch my arches as I try to stay focused when working on a deadline.  My desk is my favorite place to write creatively.  It has become my Starship Enterprise! I sit down to write and want to go places. 

A wee bit of truth here.  I cleared off my desk a few minutes ago knowing I was to put a picture of my desk on same page as Linda-Marie.  She is soooo organized, thoughtful.  I am, too, yadayada, I know - in my own way.  The photo above is how my desk looks at least 1 day a week.  My desk can at times look how I feel.  A bit busy, if not cluttered with more items than I can process in one sitting!  Maybe this is true of all of us.  I know as items become piles on my desk, it is less and less likely the items on the bottom will get the same attention as the fresh ones on top.  

To counter this, I clear off my desk regularly and use a 'woven basket system' for sorting.  My desk and study are a refuge.  Unlike other surfaces in my house, if it goes on my desk, I will get to it.  I have a large leather clad recycle bin that I make use of as I work through letters, bills and hand-outs from meetings.    I do admit, clearing through the piles is annoying, but it is part of readying my ship for the next adventure.